What's up :)

I wish I had something to write about here that was loaded with emotion and self-actualization and all that jazz but lately all I had been dealing with was frustration, so it feels good to not have to come on here to vent :) :) :)


But, nonetheless I feel like there's not much to say, but I will say this, I have been thinking real hard and for a very long time about creating some sort of poetry artwork for my somewhat large collection of poetry writing. I have had a few different ideas but I think the easiest is to create (paint) some frames and write them up and sell them. I had wanted to find someone (possibly) to illustrate or create colorful backgrounds for some of the poems, but I haven't found any willing body. But if you are interested in either getting a framed and hand written poem by me, or even if you might be interested in designing beautiful backgrounds or if you have any other ideas you would like to share with me, send me an email @ innocenceangel56@yahoo.com
Put "iangel poetry" in the subject, and I will write you back!

Other than that your prayers and positive thoughts are always loved and much appreciated by me!
Hope everyone has a Great Weekend, God is Love and Godbless!
Love, iA

# 2

So I want to say, that after writing my last post (tonight), I decided to read some of the Word and I opened my Bible to Hebrews the end of chapter 6, and it was really encouraging... to not lose faith or hope, and it reminded me that God IS always faithful and will keep the promises he made me.
In my life I have figured out that I tend to retain feelings and thoughts and so writing became an outlet for me to get free. SO, I don't like to post such negative things all the time (referring to the last post) but to be honest, life has it's ups and downs. God is in them all... I feel better now though. Hopeful... Because I know that my God is Faithful. And True.

Challenging Faith or Challenging Myself?

My life as been so perfectly imperfect, sometimes I ask if it will ever be ... what I hope or desire or expect or want it to be. Without trying to sound pathetic, I must admit, at least 50% of the time I think, I ponder my troubles that just never seem to leave me. I try to "forgive" the people who have hurt me, but they continue to do so, or I never find consolation with their resolve and I feel like I'm left hanging... with such lack... with no one to fill their place.
And then, I have tried, like so many people I have met at churches and things say, Jesus will fill that empty place.
I pray, I talk to Him... but... I still feel empty.

I feel like there is something eternally wrong with me, and no matter what I do or say, or try, it is never Right (yeah, with a capital R ).
I try to praise Him (and in my heart I do and I AM grateful and thankful), but sometimes it feels so fake... I mean, you can't DENY your pain when you praise Him... I guess that is what I am trying to find out, or ... accept. God is good.. but, my life may not always be. I have things, but oftentimes, my heart aches. My soul.... I feel misunderstood... I feel like no one even cares to Try to understand.
I feel alone.
Most times being alone doesn't bother me.... but... I guess certain situations that I expect or desire to be... more unified, at failure, make me feel, solitary.
So small in such a big world..
And I see so much of what other people, other happy people have... and I question why can't my life be so?
Why can't I have what every healthy whole normal person wants in life?
Why is my life vexed with this vexation?
Is it me, or is it God?
Am I wrong for doing what I can? I ask Him for help, for guidance...for answers...
I guess I am so blind? I hate my own lack of humility. But how can a person try to be humble?
Who am I, or who do I think I am? that I am not. Who I want to be......
God help me!

O, Heavenly City~

It is interesting how, if you think about words and where they originated from, you can gain a deeper knowledge of what they truly mean. You can also look at a word and, through prayer, gain a more spiritual knowledge about them too.

Take for instance, the word "lust". If you change the letters around, you can create the word "slut" out of it.
And take the word "hatred". Hat-red. It makes me think of someone being "hot-headed"... angry hateful and mean all the time.

Or take the word "love". In England they write of like "ov", and if you take they letters LOVE, it can be percieved like Love = Lord's Love ov everyone.

But I was watching a show a week ago, a 48 hours mystery about some scandal that happened in California. (Another one of those words....)
But the scandal happened in Los Angeles- The City of Angels.

The Holy Spirit quickened me and I saw Lost Angels.
People so often glorify celebrities and movie stars and musicians they see on tv and movies and on the radio, that they lose sight of God, and even thier own life sometimes.

thw World has lead so many people to believe that what is on tv is the truth, or the way things are supposed to be. But in most cases, it is not, and in most cases, the stories and songs are made up. and all the pretty girls have been made up with make-up, and the ones on the magazines have been made up and also photo-shop edited to appear beyond perfect physically. and we don't see any emotions except pleasure, joy and the portrayal of a lavish life.

So many americans believe what they see.
and so they are deceived.

The Bible speaks of faith as being the evidence of things NOT seen... things of God, not even dreamed or imaginged, but better than what we could ever even THINK to ask of or expect of Him.

So- I think that is why the Lord showed me the City in California as being like "Lost angels"
because they lead people into a world of tangible temporary gratifications... while leaving the cross unremembered.

And isn't it funny how all it took was a "t" to bring this revelation to my heart?

We need to stop looking to the world and imitating the world to try and fit in and be like it (the world), and start looking wothin, where God is, and letting Him be glorified in us, and let Him express Who He Is, in us, as we were created for His Purpose, and in His Image.
amen

The Sky is Falling

So it is, by human world calender, the year of 2011. And on New Year Eve at 12 am birds - tons of birds dead- fell from the sky in Arkansas, fish have washed up dead in massive number, and these things have happened across the globe in a minor amount. The scientists nor psychologists have not figured out what it means... and no one else seems to know what is up... so why don't we inquire of the LORD?

Maybe that is the First question HE wants to ask US. Why don't we inquire of HIS infinite Wisdom and Perfect Counsel more? Why are we always turning inward to our own ways and devices, and forsaking His laws, precepts and ways? ~~~~~~~~~
The LORD thy God's ways are Perfect, and His instruction leads to life.

I think there is symbolism in what He has done. I don't think that is was a toxic odor, or a nuclear chemical or some freak accident that these animals have died in massive amounts in various places. I believe God is trying to tell us something(s).

Jesus Christ used birds and fish in quite a few of His messages, according to the Gospels. And if you take the time to read what He has said, you will see it evident that He is telling us that God the Father loves us His people.
He gives ample room for anyone and everyone to :
1 Love Him
2 Live for Him, in relationship with Him
3 Repent of sin therefore leading to
4 Turn from the death of wickedness and sin to a life of forgiveness and mercy and grace

But Do we do it???

This is what you have to ask yourself for your own life. Each person is held accountable TO JESUS CHRIST on that Great and Mighty Day!

Jesus said that a bird will not fall from the sky without God (Our Heavenly Father ) knowing it... how much more does He care about us then... we are only made in His Image and likeness. Why do we turn to things, people and ourselves when we should turn to the Master Copy so to say, for advice, guidance, counsel... comfort. TRUTH.


The WORD also says, If you ask your own earthly father for a fish, will he give you a serpent? NO!
Then how much more will your Heavenly Father give you the things you ask of from Him???

God is SOOO GOOOD!

What has taken us His people away from the Glory and truth and pleasures of LIFE that God Himself has ordained for us??
What about TV. What about traffic .... and cars... and hairstyles.... and outfits... and being better than so and so.... or being angry at so and so.... or looking down on people when you should be helping them... or having a million dollars.... or having every material thing you ever wanted.... or having the next i application invented every 10 seconds of the day???
Comeon people!!!!!!

Who has a right to complain about life or thier own life when they (you?) have the power OVER your own life Over your own choices OVER your own time OVER your own actions.
Yet people want to complain all the time!

When is the last time you went without a bed to sleep on???

When is the last time you were not able to have dinner because you couldn't afford it???

When is the last time you couldn't buy a pair of shoes for your precious feet? (And I am not being sarcastic here )...


Yet people, and especially in America IN MY OWN OPINION, have seemed to have LOST the VALUE of APPRECIATION of things.
And I am saying MORE than the value of "things". But hard work. Or generosity. Or Kindness. Or time. Purity. Honor. Trust. Truthfulness.

Just to name a few off the top of my head.

Yet people want More More More.
What is there to be had if you can't even enjoy what you already do have???


LOOK AT JOB.
JOB THE BOOK IN THE BIBLE.

OR GO FOR A HIKE. WHEN IS THE LAST TIME YOU HAD TO TAKE THE BUS OR WALK TO THE STORE OR TO WORK BECAUSE YOU HAD NO GAS OR NO CAR OR NO BODY TO PICK YOU UP?

I AM JUST TRYING TO SHOW YOU WHAT IS REALLY REAL AND VALUABLE IN THIS LIFE, AND NOT TO BE CAUGHT UP IN THE WORLD AND IT'S WAYS THEREOF.

BE HONEST WITH YOURSELVES AND WITH EACH OTHER. WRITE IN YOUR JOURNAL. GO FOR A LOOONG WALK SOMEWHERE. GO SOMEWHERE BY YOURSELF ....BUY SOMEBODY SOMETHING WHO DOESN'T EXPECT IT... OR PAY FOR THE PERSON BEHIND YOU'S SANDWHICH AT THE STORE JUST FOR THE SAKE OF IT.
GOD CALLS US TO BE A LIGHT IN A DARK WORLD. HE CALLS US TO LOVE- NOT HATE. HE ASKS US TO - NO - HE COMMANDS US TO PUT HIM FIRST, NOTHING BEFORE HIM- TO HONOR HIM MORE THAN ANYTHING AND ANYONE. EVEN OURSELVES, AND ALL THOSE "THINGS" WE WANT.


THE ONLY THING THAT CAN AND EVER WILL FILL THAT VORACIOUS HUMAN APPETITE FOR "SOMETHING" IS GOD AND HIS DIVINE AND PERFECT LOVE. IF YOU HAVE THAT CRAVING FOR "SOMETHING" LIKE THERE IS SOMETHING MISSING FROM YOU OR YOUR LIFE, IT IS LOVE. AND IF YOU KNOW WHAT THE BIBLE SAYS, THEN YOU KNOW THAT GOD IS LOVE.

NOTHING ELSE WILL EVER TRULY SATISFY YOU MORE THAN BEING IN A LOVING RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD THE FATHER AND THE LORD JESUS CHRIST! AMEN!


LOVE~
IANGEL!